tenaugusttwentyeleven

10 august. it was to be the most devastating day of my life. you left to serve the nation with a phone that has only 3 bars. when 11 pm came, it was 2 bars for the calling which dint even happen, then 1 bar. 1 bar for 9 nine days. :( i miss you so much baby.

lets keep you updated babycakes. <3 the morning we left :((, papa drove us to some motorbike workshop(guess its to survey something for the babysister). i excused myself to go home after that since i wasnt feeling too well. i feel like puking each time i think of the fact that i do not have you around for like the next 10 days. i reached home & drowned myself in tears trying to fall asleep so time could fly really fast & then hope its time to see you again. i woke up 10 minutes late to break my fast, nobody woke me up. again it dawned in me that its just been only 7 hours that passed since i last saw you & ive got like 92347892357hours left till we meet again. food dint make me happy that day. somehow the chicken tasted funny, the bread smell bad, the drink was tasteless. i know i sound like im exaggerating, but truth is i cannot stand being without you. i needed you so badly i kept wondering if your superiors are nice, the senior boys are treating you well, whether youre eating enough, whether 0r not your rest is sufficient. sigh. life cannot get any harder than this & the same fateful day, there just had to be fight at home involving me.

im typing this during lunch break & i thought maybe i'll just keep updating here for the next 9 days before you come back right to me. i cannot wait to see you again sweetcheeks, i swear. i'll pray to Allah time will go by so fast, i'll be seeing you as soon as tomorrow. i love you so much honeybuns. <33

I LOVE MUHAMMAD HAFIZ BIN MUSA.

& i am missing you so much, Why does work have to take you away from meeeeee. Bleagh. :(

birthday with love; it feels like magic

I wish you were here

Just maybe;

I could do with a little concern. I miss you.

if Black is the colour to describe it, then Black it shall be.

It has never been easy all this time. Never been, but just that this time, it feels much worse than i thought. & when i thought ive got the hang of everything, thats when things start to turn the other way around. I thought maybe karma if that was even karma, shes done with her deeds & was about to leave but then again, guess i was wrong. I have no idea what im doing, sitting up so early in the morning rattling off like this. I woke up to a text that got me thinking real hard. Is this even real? I am somewhere where noone wants to be. Won't you please come get me, save me, please. :'(

Where are you now?

if only;

if i could change fate, i would ask to be reborn again & meet you on the same night we first fell eyes on each other. i am willing to go through everything again with you, every single day of my life. i miss you yesterday, today everyday. i miss you Muhammad Hafiz Bin Musa.

until i get back what ive lost, im going to be hard on myself.

i want you to know, with everything i wont let this go.

because i have not been out here that long. & so i missed out on so much about the how boyfriend feels about me. love can be bought, so it seems. i should know where to go to, where to run now when im lost, when i dont understand whats going on. i pray God give you happiness & all that youve never felt, never had for this girl who is with you gave you none.

im sorry, love.

for the sake of our love;

let's backtrack, please.

You can put the blame on me.

It was a mistake i know will sting you for a very very long time. I broke your trust again, at the most most most vulnerable stage of our relationship. I have realised how much it has cost us. I do not want to go through something like that again.


Forgive me, love.

Icannotaffordtoloseyoubaby.

well, nobody said it was easy

Alhamdulillah. Syukur Alhamdulillah.

Nothing can stop us now.

You know i love you.

I dont want to be sitting around telling myself that nothing can be done. If theres something to prove, i guess i have to start somewhere, right?

we.

i'm thinking what has gotten us this far; & then i realised it was that feeling that did not leave me even for a moment from the day you & i said our first "hello".

Promise me you'll take good care when im away?

Sigh, i miss you already baby.

How nice would it be, if the word 'qualm' never existed in the dictionary.

Love says;

It's impossible to be wise when you're in love.

When love is anything, but.

Boyfriend, i love you no matter what k. ;)

If Yan can cook, so can we!

We had some whooping fun smokin' Cinta's kitchen with the aroma of Thai Tom Yam.

& so an hour before that we were just sitting around with nothing to do, then me the macam paham girlfriend suggested to the boyfriend, "Baby, i feel like cooking. Masak Tom Yam, yok?" I thought i wanted to back out just as i said those things, but then the boyfriend was already changing into his jeans going, " Ah lah. Yok, macam best eh masak-masak? We go down buy the ingredients, yok?" Okaaay, & then i knew nothing would change his mind until he got that tom yam brewing on his stove.

Let's meet Momo Ramsay & Piej Oliver; nice collaboration eh? HAHA.

Momo Ramsay with a kind heart, even borrowed Piej Oliver his top so as not to let any stains get in his partner's way while cooking. (no wonder she's in love with you)

Momo Ramsay sensei starts cutting up all the ingredient, then dunking everything into the pot. Piej Oliver looks on. Only. :)

Oh. No, he did not spare Piej Oliver. She tries very hard to be a good chef partner tho she know nuts about what cooking is really like.

If cooking isn't Piej Oliver's forte, taking lots of pictures sure is her cup of tea. :D

Smile Momo Ramsay, smile!

Piej Oliver made him snap a picture of her holding the wooden senduk so at least theres like one shot which at least shows her um you know, doing something?

The hot brewing tom yam.

The hot brewing chickies tom yam.

Then we did the food test, we tried the soup a little. It turned out pretty perfect for a first timer. Kudos to Momo Ramsay sensei for your sweat and hardwork & Piej Oliver for your hungry anticipation. Happy Faces after a sumptious Sg made Thai Tom Yam. Sawadeeeekaa~

Love

Whats next baby? Hmm? (flips recipe book)

Love alone matters.

I would always ask my myself - Why do i love you?.. & the only thing i came up with was the reason to see you smile. Often telling myself i am sensible enough when it comes to love, but somehow all that happens is just a reflection of me being incapable of pulling it off. I am very imperfect but i guess the only thing thats worthy enough of me is my sincerity to love you & to love you, only. Waking up each day knowing that youre just right there, makes my very first second of the day count. I decided on forever when i first saw you; now God, please, make that come true.

Baby, i love you.

I don't need a second to lose

This angel, God sent from above.
I love you.